Learning To Go With The Ups and Downs

Hello Hello Loved Ones!

This week has had it's ups and downs but at the end of the week it ended on an up. Sister Jenkins and I have been extremely blessed as we have worked hard on our companionship and with the Lord. So happy note, it was such a tender mercy to have Sister Sloat and her husband attend church together for the first time in a long time. She is an investigator who has been ready for baptism for quite some time and now is finally the time. I know the Lord's timing is beautiful.

So before I go on I want to share the gratitude I feel for soldiers who sacrifice so much for our freedom and well being. I felt a deeper appreciation and connection to our veterans and soldiers when I realized that missionaries relate to soldiers in the sense of sacrificing everything for the well being of others. They see people die physically whereas we see people die spiritually. The fight is similar in the sense of wanting to bring people home. I am grateful for the Savior's example and pray that we will remember more fully to show our gratitude and strive to follow His footsteps. President Summerhays related soldiers to the Savior in his weekly letter and it made me think of putting our hands over our hearts when standing up for our Nation's flag and that made me think of a personal experience I had. When I put my hand over my heart I reflect on the thought that my heart is in the Savior's hands. I think of the piercings on His hands when I have it on my heart it reminds me of His love for me and again that my heart is in His hands. Thinking about Memorial Day and the deep appreciation I have for those who fight, I now can make that connection of thinking of the Savior and my country whenever I stand up for the flag and put my hand over my heart. I can think of the person who gave the ultimate sacrifice for our happiness, my Savior, Jesus Christ. 

So, where do I begin? I always feel so frazzled in writing because I don't feel like I update everyone thoroughly enough. There is so much that happens within one day and Dixon put it great recently when he said 1 day feels like a week and a week is only 1 day. It's crazy how happens!  Last week was full of ups and downs, but I can happily say once I got through the downs (even with how crazy it is) I am finally loving it!!! I love being on a mission, I love this work and of course I miss you all like crazy, but I love being here!

Here is an example of the ups and downs and the true reality of a mission. 2 weeks or so ago, Sister Jenkins and I met a woman named Theory (oh random note before I forget by the way Sister Jenkins is majoring in ASL and had the brilliant idea of starting an ASL class at the church, fantastic sneaky missionary tool).  So we met Theory 2 weeks ago and were riding past a house that she was sitting out front and we waved and said Hi cheerfully. As we were riding away I just felt like we should go back and talk to her, so we turned around, introduced ourselves and asked if we could say a prayer with her and if there is anything she needed prayers for. It was a really neat experience because as we got talking to her about the role God and faith has played in her life she told us of an experience she had where she had a heart attack and was passed out by herself in her house for 3 days. Her nephew couldn't get a hold of her, got worried and checked on her and found her on the ground at home unconscious. Luckily the doctors brought her back, but that experience showed her that God still needed her here. It was awesome and perfect because the spirit brought to my mind the story of Alma and how he was unconscious for 3 days, so I brought it up and read her his experience with seeing Christ and testifying of the happiness the Savior wants for us and that there is nothing that Christ can't fix or take care of. We gave her a Book of Mormon and prayed with her and it was a really neat experience, she was so receptive and touched. Well we got her address, planned to meet and were very encouraged by her when she said she had been feeling down, stressed and overwhelmed when we had waved to her, said hi and smiled at her she said it made her feel special and she said it just melted her heart like a marshmallow and made her day. She felt great about everything we talked about and Sister Jenkins and I testified it was the spirit witnessing to her God's love and truth. So it was a very cool experience and encouraging but it's so sad, we have never seen her since then and can't get a hold of her.  We have called and called, and tried to find her address but have had no luck. It is so much more discouraging when the spirit is there so strong and you know they know. It got harder after that because that Sunday we were planning on 5 or 6 investigators coming to Church and we were positive that they were going to come, but none of them came to church - super let down. After I had another rude awakening with that side of the mission, during studies on Sunday, I had a lot of awesome insights and Sister Jenkins was great in reassuring me and comforting me that this is part of the mission :) ha ha! She is awesome and has such a strong positive testimony. We were blessed from the Lord that day and things seemed to turn around again.

One of the best blessings last week was when we were looking for Theory's house and didn't have luck, because the house address didn't exist on the street :) whether that was a mistake or on purpose, who knows. Either way Sister Jenkins was firm in knowing that we were in that area for a reason. So we prayed and knocked on about 4 doors with no success, we prayed again, decided to knock on 2 more doors and then go on our way. It was so cool! The next house we knocked on we met Tamika Thomas and asked if we could say a prayer for her and she was ridiculously receptive and excited and such a sweetheart, a beautiful spirit, it caught us completely by surprise and I was stunned by how strong the spirit was. She automatically opened up about her life and all that she was going through (she's a mother of 3, her dad died recently, her mother is struggling and isn't even going to Tamkia's oldest daughter's graduation from highschool, is going to nursing school, and basically has a lot on her shoulders) and we testified to her truths from the spirit of God that she needed to hear. We said a peace and blessings prayer with her and I was a little intimated because Sister Jenkins asked me to say it and goodness, the spirit was strong and we all cried. After the pray we cried more as she told us that before we came she had been praying to Heavenly Father that morning for help and she had just made a cup of coffee and then we knocked on the door. It was so cool and even cooler that she recognized that we were sent from God! And before we could even offer to teach lessons and meet with her again, she was asking when we could come back and teach her children and their friends and her and my jaw just dropped. Ha ha! She was making our job easy. It was such a tender mercy and she is prepared and we are soo excited to teach her and feel very strong that she will get baptized - just praying with all of our hearts though. :) I know that there are no coincidences in life.  We meet people for a reason and God's timing is orchestrated perfectly, we just need to be open and ready to follow along with the conductor's hand. Then we can be in harmony and find the beauty in the last notes that lead up to the glorious ending of life's song. The main melody that keeps the piece complete is Christ, He is the center piece to life's plan.

In relief society the teacher had a neat object lesson. She told the story of Peter and Christ walking on the water and asked why did peter fall and begin to sink? Because he looked down, he took his eyes off the Savior. She then handed out peacock feathers and told us to try and balance it on 1 finger. She said you can always balance a peacock feather when you look and focus on the eye of the peacock feather, it's pretty neat and fun. She then completed it by asking where is our focus? When we focus on Christ our lives will be balanced. I know this to be true and have seen the immense difference in my life especially on my mission. I know that by small and simple means of scripture study and prayer, they make the biggest changes and affect the course of our lives when we choose whether or not to read them and pray. I know when we focus on Christ all other things fall into place and the happiness is found. And if you happen to look away or get distracted, don't panic, just like Peter turn and cry out to the Savior and He will be there to lift you back up again. Focus on Him, make the small effort to put aside your pride and ask him to help you, allow yourself to partake of the enabling power of the Atonement and witness for yourself the wonders and miracles that can happen in your life. Ether 2:24-25 and 3:2-6, 9-14.

It is learning to go with the ups and downs and finding joy of life's roller coaster, the end result is returning home and you can either enjoy it or painfully endure it. If it's up to me, I choose to enjoy! It doesn't mean it's always easy and there are definitely frustrations.  Sister Jenkins and I have had to try really hard to work with each other. We have had our moments of aggravation with each other but it's been great because we both are sincere in our relationship with the Lord and we both desire to be lead by His spirit and have unity in companionship to bring about greater blessings and work from the Lord. To bring His sheep to the fold but we need to gain His trust and work together. It's nice because we talk to each other about everything when we're mad at each other. We try to get to the bottom of things and we both are willing to work on our own parts that contribute to whatever the problem is at hand. You have to when you are with someone 24 hours or you will boil over to insanity. We laugh about it a lot because we have had to work hard with each other because we are so similar and it's hard, but I am so grateful for her and the improvement and strength our companionship has made. We have fun and love each other but it doesn't mean we don't have to work at it. The best part is, we try to put the Savior and the Lord between us when we have frustrations so that we take contention and anger out, which isn't of God and focus on what needs work. It was beautiful when one of these times we were having a hard time and were talking through things and she stopped and said a prayer and it was awesome because it brought the spirit and it's the best to have God's love at the head of everything. It's a process but it is worth it in the end and things can be dealt with just like the Savior did. I love what one of the other missionaries said at a district zone conference, he said, "Us and trust can't be spelled without "U"." Awesome right? It does come down to trust and I like to ask myself daily now, "Have I trusted today" or "Have I trusted in the Lord today?"

Well I love you all and I need to run but remember everything happens for a reason and I love you all so much!!!  Oh and last happy news (and why this week ended on an up), we have 3 baptism dates set!!! We reached our goal for the week, they are Sister Sloat, Robert Janjanin, and Theresa.

Love you all so much, my eternal love, God speed,

Sister Tasha Cosette Bush

Hmmm...what to title this email?

Hello family!

Ahhhh, I only have 9 minutes, so sorry this is going to be a lame email but I want to thank everyone for writing, and I truly to appreciate each email and letter and it means a lot. This week has been amazing as Sister Jenkins and I have worked harder to be a more unified companionship. It is incredible and the work moves forward and the spirit flows more between us. We get along great but we were able to work out more by being more open and I just adore her and am grateful for communication! It's been such a learning experience and I appreciate that we are able to give each other advice with out taking things personal and being able to work through figuring out why things bother each other and we don't stop until we figure it out. It again has just been awesome, I am so grateful for her!

Anywho, I'm so sorry that this is going to be short, I wish I could write something more inspirational and what not but for now I will just have to send you all some pretty awesome pictures of mailboxes. Oh and mam, I love you so much, your email almost made me cry in public but I held it together, I love you!

Be Strong, remember who you really are and more importantly whose you are (God loves you so much!). Oh and here's my mission president's letter for the week, all of his letters are great but I thought this one was really cool.

"President Summerhays 20 May 2013

Dear Sisters and Elders,

Shortly before I embarked on this wonderful missionary journey, a sports announcer asked my son-in-law, “ why would he (me) give up all of this (the competitive golf world) to do missionary work?” Why would I? Why would you? Why would a collegiate basketball player or football player leave his university career for two years? Why would a filmmaker leave his passion to serve and not even watch a movie for two years? Why would we leave our fathers and mothers, our school or our work, our friends and family and other things that we cherish? We all give up a lot that is dear to us. It is a good thing for us to pause and remember why we were willing to give up all to serve our Lord.

As missionaries of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we need to place our whole confidence in the Lord Jesus Christ. We face many challenges and much stress and anxiety every day. As we live His teachings and look to Him as the Way, the Truth and the Life in all phases of our lives, we receive help for our anxiety about the future and our ability to handle these challenges. The fundamental principle of our religion is faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.

I know that Faith in Jesus Christ and His Atonement is a principle that requires action and delivers power. Faith in Him is more than mere acknowledgement that He lives. It is more than professing belief. Faith in Jesus Christ consists of complete reliance on Him. He knows how to help us rise above our daily difficulties. Always seek to learn so that you can apply. Make this your motto: “When the Lord commands, do it, and if possible, do it today.” Do not procrastinate. Delay will rob you of the Spirit that you could enjoy today. Repent and immediately will the power of the Spirit come. The Power that will come immediately through the Spirit is the Power of peace. The Power of strength, the Power of happiness; the Power of Love; indeed any Power that we need to accomplish the purposes of the Lord in our lives. I testify this Power will come immediately upon our repentance or our commitment to change. Consider these truths:

“..harden not your hearts any longer; for…now is the time and the day…therefore repent and…immediately shall the great plan of redemption be brought about unto you…do not procrastinate the day of your repentance…for this day is given us to prepare for eternity…” Alma 36:31,33.

“…do as He hath commanded you; for which if ye do He doth immediately bless you…” Mosiah 2:24

“When obedience ceases to become an irritant and becomes our quest, IN THAT MOMENT, God will endow us with Power.”

Now is the time for us to improve. Today is the day to act on the things we have been prompted to do. Let us not miss out today on the happiness and peace that will come immediately upon our demonstration of faith by our improvement. Join me today in exercising faith unto repentance: so that we may enjoy His power. I pray that God will bless us all to believe in Him, to accept Him and to fully trust in Him. I love you all. I believe in you all.

President Summerhays ☺☺☺"


I love you all! Keep up in being happy and strive to be a missionary this week or for one day :D

Love,
Sister (Tasha) Bush

The Plan of Happiness

Helloa, helloa!

 

Goodness this last week has been all over the place. I was so frustrated and discouraged but the Lord gently reminded me of His love for me and why He has called me to the work. So before this email gets incoherent and what not, I will simplify with the 2 biggest things I learned this week.

 

1. The Lord only asks a little of us and in comparison to all that He has given we should happily enjoy the process of growth rather then endure. We should be giving as much of our lives as we possibly can to Him instead of going to Him and demanding that we get what we want and expect us to do nothing on our end. He only asks for our love and a small portion of our time to pray and read scriptures and how hard is that?! We get blessings for obedience, isn't that incredible?

 

2. The plan of happiness is for me too :)

 

So, this week I had a lot of hard days, I had many times that I just longed to not be on a mission. I realized on Friday just how much I miss home and my family. I was craving to be back in the comfort of home and being able to do things for me.  Heck I even missed school! :p ha ha! But it was hard. I really miss everyone and it seemed so daunting to have 17 more months, during personal study I went into the bedroom and sobbed. I prayed to Heavenly Father, saying, "I don't know if I can do this, I can't do this." And yet in those moments of frustration and desperation I felt so much peace and love in my heart from the Lord. I have felt very insecure and overwhelmed at times in teaching the gospel in thinking, wow this person needs salvation and how can I possibly help them see that they can be so much happier. It was nice to talk it out with Sister Jenkins and realize to stop giving myself such a hard time for not being perfect at it all. And to also not feel bad that I had feelings of not wanting to be on a mission because that is normal. I also felt bad because I love the Lord and that is why I'm here and I felt bad for then not wanting to be here. I started to compare myself to the Book of Mormon prophets and feeling like a terrible person because I wasn't as cool as they were in having such a strong desire to serve a mission after fighting a war. I was amazed with how and where they found that strength to want to serve mission after mission. And then I felt a lot better about myself when I remembered and even Sister Jenkins brought it up that even Gordon B. Hinkley had his moment of not wanting to be on a mission when he wrote his father that he was wasting his time. Gordon B. Hinkley was an amazing man and even he had his moments of, "This is Hard."

 

So friends and family, it's ok to admit that sometimes life is hard, but it's nice (and takes away a little bit of the fears and frustrations) to just be able to admit it. To be able to get off your chest - wow this is hard and scary, aggravating and painful. I can testify to you all that the best person to be completely open and honest to about life, is God. Go to Him in your prayers and be honest.  Let Him know - I love you, but right now, wow, this is hard. And then will your eyes be opened to the purpose of it all, then will you start to see the bigger picture and realize that this isn't anything you can't handle. :) Realize, "Hey maybe I can have a goal to do 1 thing for God everyday." Then will you see His hand more fully in your life. He knows us so well, shouldn't we take the time to get to know Him? Shouldn't we take the time to cry, calm down, breathe and look to Him in seeing what He is teaching us about Himself in our trial?

On Friday, a lot of our investigator's weren't following through on appointments and what not. It was especially painful to have a recent convert who I care very much about call us and let us know that the church wasn't for her anymore and that she didn't want to see us. Tender mercy though, was finding a letter from my Dad which gave me the positive lift. Another tender mercy was going to Willie Pearl's house, this sweet elderly woman who I doesn't remember that she is a member of the church, is in a wheel chair, is almost blind, and had a difficult time speaking and forming words. We read to her from The Book of Mormon and sang two hymns.  It took everything within me not to cry while we sang and she tried to hum out what she could along with us. It hit me so strong, "Who else would take time to sing to her if not you." Who else will serve if not you? Who else to make her day a little more interesting then just the pointless noise of the tv in the background? She called us angels and said that she hoped she made us better, as we were leaving I asked to give her a hug, she said she would like that very much. It caught me off guard when I went to give her a light hug and she with her frail skeleton bone arms hugged me with a strong embrace. It wasn't me helping her but her helping me. I have never felt so much love and as hard I was trying, I broke and I cried. She didn't realized how much she truly did make me better. And I realized that I was asking the wrong question when I said who else would take time for her, who else then her would have been the right angel that I needed in that moment. That moment where God let me know that I needed His love just as much as His sheep that I am lucky enough to be called to serve. But it's not just for me, it's for all of us. D&C 4: 3, "Therefore, if ye have desires to serve God ye are called to the work." If you love God you are called to His work, that doesn't mean serve a mission but I think you all know what it means. :)

 

Friday still had it's up and down, an investigator we cared about didn't show up for a church tour but it was during that time that I realized that this plan of happiness I am teaching to everyone is for me too! Again God wouldn't send me here to be miserable and I know that He truly wants us all to be happy and successful!!!

 

I love you all so much and argggh the timing is ticking. I hope I can remember to tell you about the story of the woman who's name is Theory. She is awesome! Anywho, I realized no matter the days that are hard the whole day, it makes it all worth it when there is that one person who said, they needed you. It is worth it when One person says you make a difference because you waved or smile or talked to them, you changed their life. It is my prayer that you wonderful family and friends take that time to help make the difference for One person. Even if it's your spouse or kid or close friend, let them know what a benefit they are in your life. And knowing you all, you already do.

 

I can't say it enough, I love you all so much and miss you more then words can ever say. And I am so happy I got to skype with you mom and dad. I love you two so much and it was such a blessing to see you, I love you, I love you, I love you!!!!

 

God be with you all, my eternal love,

 

Sister Tasha C. Bush

Week 5

Dear Loved Ones!

Oh goodness so much has happened and I have never felt so close to the Lord in my life, this week's focus has been on less actives or what we have been encouraged to say, "Returning Members." I love that because it has such a positive connotation to it, we are helping them return and remember the testimonies and relationship they already have with Christ that they have just forgotten. Instead of less they are gaining that remembrance and discovering the love the Lord truly has for them.

Keys things I have learned this week: the beauty and truth of being exactly obedient even in the smallest forms. We hear repeatedly here in the mission field, "Obedience brings blessings but exact obedience brings miracles." It is so true! I know I gain an added measure with the spirit when I am constantly repenting and striving to be better. That's another thing I found beautiful, to repent as often as possible. Repentance doesn't have to be a negative thing, it is very motivating and turns your thoughts and heart to the Savior consistently  And it is very motivating finding even in the small things that desire to want to show my love more for Heavenly Father and Christ. Another thing I have learned and cheesy but true = Love! It's the biggest tool to keep me motivated, to remind me why I'm serving, and to remember who I am and to learn more fully of God's love. I always am turned to the lyrics from Les Miserable that best describes this, "To Love Another Person IS to SEE the face of God." This week I have poured my heart and soul to God and found my answers into not giving up on the mission. It has been tough to Love people with all your heart and see them decide to walk away from God and to learn my part is to just trust in God that it will work out. And so far it has!

Beautiful purple blossomed trees in Florida

The sweet little girl we have been meeting, (Danesha), we were thrilled with because she said that she believed and said yes to the baptism invitation. It was such a wonderful experience but a couple days latter we had her aunt call telling us that we shouldn't be calling or texting a 10 year old girl and she told us that if we called again she would call the cops on us. I was stunned because her mother has always known, we have only called to set up appointments, and we only text out a scripture of the day, every day. Nothing inappropriate. We were kind to the Aunt but after we hung up I was so frustrated because this little girl has such a strong testimony and it killed me to know that this was being taken away from her without a choice on her part. It was so sad too because she kept calling our phone and left a voicemail crying on it. We then got a text from her saying that she wasn't with her aunt and was with her mom. We were lucky to text the mom and make sure everything was ok and we are meeting with her this week. We have been very blessed! I am praying with all my heart that her mother will give permission for her to be baptized, this girl is special!

Anywho other blessings: we asked our branch president's (President Stretch) mother-in-law to pray to be baptized, she is 102 and goes to church, has read The Book of Mormon but hasn't been baptized because she doesn't think she needs to because she's been baptized in the Methodist church. We explained in a tactful way why she needed to be baptized and asked her to pray about it and on Sunday when we say her she was a lot more positive about it all. She hasn't prayed yet but we are meeting with her on Tuesday/tomorrow and we are praying she will pray to get that answer :D So pray for Sweet Sister Stutzs! I know it would mean so much to Sister Stretch, she clearly has a wonderful relationship with her mother and I know that for Sister Stutzs the blessings she could obtain from this step would be amazing.

Oh and speaking of our focus with Returning members, Sister Jenkins and I discovered yesterday we have about 60 people to bring back to church and to help rekindle their testimonies. Crazy eh?!

Anywho, my time is running out on the clock but I love you all so much. And I will be writing snail mail letters home today, so woot to the woot! Oh and I'll have to write about the beautiful blessing I received from the Branch President, very neat experience.

The last thing I wanted to write about before I'm kicked off :) I wanted to wish Mama, a belated happy birthday. It about broke my heart when I realized I never sent a letter to wish this amazing woman a Happy Birthday!!!! Mama mumsie :) I love you so much. I am seriously the luckiest girl in the world to have you as a mother. You have prepared me for a mission my whole life without even realizing it because you are that much of an incredible woman and qualify along side Emma Smith  that beautiful description of an Elect Lady. You have taught me to Love with all my heart, you have taught the importance of selfless service, you have been the example of always having a bold and humble testimony of the truth of the gospel and of our Savior, Jesus Christ. I know that any of the success I have out here on the mission is credited back to you. I only hope to honor all that you have taught me in the knowledge of being a daughter of God and a witness of Christ. I love you and will have a letter coming your way of everything or at least try to write everything that I am grateful for because of you. I love you so much and again I can't express enough the depths of love and gratitude I have that you are my mother.

So much love for you all and of course miss you like crazy but I can be happy to know that the Lord is watching over each and every one of you!

My (cheesy) eternal love :)

Sister (Tasha) Bush